The Diary of Working Mama..

Farha was warded for pneumonia for almost 4 days in hospital. Last March, she was also warded due to viral infection. My doa is hopefully, no more admission or warded in hospital. With my third son, it was nothing new to be warded for various reasons, diarrhea , food poisoning, flu (antibiotic not complete). I guess that's why my lady boss said, many working women are trapped between family and career. But about man? I guess trapped within their own bird(s). After all, life goes on.

Since I came back for good in January 2009, life in Malaysia, has been full of surprises. Surprise to see many things change. You even now can easily meet with obese people while walking in the malls or almost everywhere. Even when you go back to kampung, you can meet obese people. What happened? It was difficult to meet obese people. But perhaps, due to our easy access to foods and drinks, life is getting better. Lack of physical activities might also contribute to this. My second surprise is the hiking prices of goods, foods and etc. I still remember my first visit to Plaza Low Yatt, I need to go the loo, and the charge was RM and not cents. That was back in 2004. I am not sure nowadays. Masya Allah. With almost everything is going up, petrol, electricity, water,etc, my doa is that we are strong enough to witness the wind of change. This goes back on how smart do you manage your income. My doa also is that while everything goes up, my iman and faith also will go up. Insya Allah, Ya R...

As I put this entry, many things happened. The most feared storm left Philipina, which left the country in shock and misery. Ya Allah, Ya Rabb, protects us in good and bad time. Every thing happens with a reason. Of what occured lately, I remember there is a hadith from the hadith Prophet Muhamad (s.a.w) that when killings become rampant, earthquake or storms hit the world more often, that is signals that the earth is too old and we are living in the final world. Masya Allah. Ya Rabb, as time goes by, a year like few weeks, it reminds me of myself, whose deeds and works are not suffice as preparation for the hereafter. May Allah grants us the strength to add more rather than keep on complaining in day to day life.

Semalam merupakan awal muharam 1435 H, begitu cepat masa berlalu ku rasakan. Masih banyak amal ibadahku yang perlu diperbaiki, serta sisa masa yang tinggal ini. Bulan ini merupakan masa yang dinantikan oleh ahli tempat ku bekerja. Ya, pengiktirafan duniawi yang dinanti-nantikan, mudah-mudahan ianya memberi barakah dan ketenangan dalam kehidupan. Sengaja aku paparkan gambar sewaktu perjalanan ku di bumi asing, ke sebuah daerah bernama York, di Great Britain tanggal March lalu. Betapa kadang-kala aku merindui suasana sejuk yang mencengkam jiwa itu, ianya mengingatkan aku tentang masa. Ia biarkan ia berlalu. Semoga pengalaman yang tidak seberapa di bumi asing itu dapat ku kongsikan dengan anak cucu ku suatu hari nanti.

Masya Allah, how time flies, a day seems like minutes. This is perhaps what the Prophet Muhammad reminds us Muslims in Surah Al-Asr. Appreciating time with sabr (patience and sabr). In reality, sometimes, it is easily said than done. Approaching October, reminds me of what have I accomplished for year 2013. Ya Allah, may Allah grants me the patience in life. Next week, insya Allah, Muslims are going to celebrate Eidul Adha. My doa to all Muslims especially those who are performing hajj at the moment and may the time comes for me and hubby to perform the hajj one day. Let me feel young and energetic all time in performing ibadah and life is part of ibadah. This week, I feel a little bit guilty leaving my kids in day care. I wish I will be around to take care them. Allah knows best. May Allah protects them always.

2013 September, marks the new semester for students in most public and private universities. Yahoo! lecture and tutorials are expected to commence this week. MAsya Allah, I miss the joy of delivering lecture and sharing knowledge with students. However, sometimes, I myself learn new things from them. The courage to face all walks of students is not easy. Sometimes they really test your patience! Whatever it is, sincerity is keyword to all aspects of what we are doing.

The increasing price of petrol, of course, saddened everyone, except those who are born to be rich! Some says think positively of what happened, perhaps, it is time to lessen outings and window shopping and even eating outside. Well, it takes two to tango. And yet the government has been so spendthrift for the past few years. Managing money wisely especially by the government is the key to a harmonious economy and if we need to invest, invest wisely. Don't ask me how will I survive in this coming difficult time, it is a matter of time that we will try to come over with it!

Masya Allah! September comes, another four months to 2014. Alhamdulillah, Allah for giving me the opportunity to cherish the time given. So many things happened, how fast time flies. A year feels like a month, a day gone by just like a blink. After all, life is about appreciate and forgiveness. The breaking news on fuel increasing breaks many heart and might be sensitive for the meantime. Life is full of struggle and gratitude. Yups, if we comparative study, we should be thankful, but what I dislike comparison?

Tomorrow- 31 August 2013 marked the 56th years of Independence Day. Alhamdulillah, syukur, for His blessings. We had a celebration yesterday plus the Syawal or Eidul Fitri celebration. How time flies and seeing my kids growing, how blessed we are to see them growing and aging (for me and hubby). Hubby marked his 40th year of birth day this year, insya Allah, I will follow him next year, life at 40s are more settled and focused compared to the early days of 20s. Yet, many aspects need improvement, especially solat and your good deeds. Well, got to go, it is time to proudly present your Malaysian flag...

Eid Mubarak! Today marked the 14 of Syawal, and masya Allah, it has been quite sometimes for not updating and writing in this blog. Too many things which need to be prioritize rather than blogging. After all, blogging is something that I embrace when I feel like writing. But it does not mean, no blogging, no writing. I still enjoy writing manually rather than facing the lap top and typing. So, how's your Eid? As for me, alhamdulillah, we really enjoyed it and of course, there have been lessons learned from Syawal this year. Luckily, it is on semester break, so since I have no class, I have so much time to spend on my project and family matters. Got to go, enjoy the pics captured during the Eid Mubarak!

Alhamdulillah today marked our 15 days in the blessed month of Ramadan. Masya Allah, how time flies, as for my sons, Faris and Fatih, alhamdulillah, so far so good in performing their ibadah assiyam. As for Fakhri, he is still a little boy.

My little boy, Fakhri turns four this year. He is still on pampers when is at home but if he goes to TASKA, he is being trained by teachers for potty training. I called him my PhD baby, as one month before I submitted my PhD thesis, I found myself pregnant. I hope by the end of this year, he is no longer using pampers and he can speak better, no " pelat ". Some people might make fun of him due to his slang, I don't mind, but I believe, there is always better way how to communicate your concern about his slang. I guess a kid like him also does not like to be condemned in the crowds. May Allah guide these type of people whom I encountered when they know that Fakhri still does not speak properly. " Oh My English"! Alhamdulillah, I went through the morning sickness until the day I delivered him. I understand it is not easy to become a mama. The first hurdle is to control your morning sickness, I guess mine is not morning only, it is all day- regardless night or...

Alhamdulillah, as we are approaching the blessed month in Islam, Ramadan al Mubarak, how time flies and how do I really miss this month. Last year, I was on maternity confinement, thus, I miss fasting. It is not merely of hunger and thirst, but fasting means a lot for a practicing Muslim. It is the heart and the soul- sort of refresher. Insya Allah, may Allah give me the chance to meet the blessed month in Islam- Ahlan Wa Sahlan Ya Ramadan! In the pic: My third son, Fakhri is enjoying his favourite dish ayam madu, i.e. Honey Chicken.

This entry sounds like a title of an old song, 60s or 70s pop song. It sounds sad when a person keeps its sadness to its own. Sometimes I think it is better rather than telling everyone that you are not feeling happy, i.e. S.A.D. If you keep on sharing your sadness, there are two possible outcome either people really sympathize with you OR people will ignore you totally. After all, sadness is part of our ups and downs in life. Life goes on...May Allah give us the strength to face the reality of life. Looking at the political turmoil in Egypt really makes me sad, how do you sack a Prime Minister who was elected by his own people? Perhaps that is life too. Sometimes the decision made is irrational, but due to what reason?

How time flies, 3rd July marked the first year of my little daughter. Alhamdulillah, asykuruka Ya Rabb. Being a working mama is not easy, balancing life sometimes makes me mixed up. Well, assabru Jamil. Insya Allah, my prayers are always with all mama outside there. Well, at the same time, I have started marking my final exam papers. Reading the exam papers often put in dilemma- how good or well have you taught for the last semester? It does not mean that more students getting grade A indicates that you have done your teaching well- it is still the outcome that people will measure, but I love to say- how really your teaching turn your students into a new leaf? that is too idealistic. but hello, time to continue marking... Pic: Me and my little girl in front of Annual SLSA Conference, 2013 in University of York, United Kingdom

Alhamdulillah, I felt blessed as we are approaching the month of Ramadan. Syaaban is the month to prepare mentally and physically, alhamdulillah, by the time I am typing this entry, I still have one day to qada fasting. 2012/1433 H I was on maternity leave or confinement after delivering my baby girl. Looking back, how time flies. I still have projects which I have not accomplished and I pray to Allah to give me the strength to accomplish this project for the sake of ummah or society at large. Insya Allah . Rabbi Yassir Wa La Tuathir.

Initially, when I enrolled myself to this workshop, I don't have any idea what is the purpose of the workshop? I thought how we should strive for success. Despite what is meant by success, I have still goals and aims which I have not accomplished in life. Being a mother, I have lists of wishes and targets, well, embracing motherhood sometimes really challenge and test your inner self. Alhamdulillah and I always doa that I will try my best to be a good mama for my four growing and lovely kids ( in my eyes). In today's world, believe me, they are the IPAD generation who are full of energy and ideas. May Allah rewards us always for whatever deeds we do in this temporary world, as it is the end that we aim. Insya Allah.

This was my third time attending SLSA Conference, In 2006, I presented a paper as part of my PhD work in Stirling University, Scotland. Alhamdulillah, I was sponsored by the SLSA, we managed to sleep in Primier Inn Hotel for two nights. My second time, back in 2008, I met my ex-supervisor in Manchester University and I was presenting some of my final PhD work. This time attended and presented in York University. I met my ex-supervisor again, and as usual, we had a long chat, busy updating ourselves with fresh and new gossips. He looks the same just like I met him in Manchester in 2006. Well, I will try to upload some of the pictures later. Anyway, the paper that I presented received good comments and suggestions. May Allah give me the strength to improve the paper and perhaps, (well it must be submitted to refereed journal as suggested by my ex supervisor). Cheers!

Wow, it is mid March already and yet, so many tasks and duties that I need to accomplish. Of course, sometimes you have to sacrifice your bed time, just simply to make it done! May Allah grant me the strength. Life is full of possibilities. Pic: It was a challenging month for us, baby Farha was warded for almost a week, a few days before our journey to London (25 March 2013-29 March 2013) Alhamdulillah, for giving us the chance to visit London and back to memory land..There is always something that I miss in London!

Fuh,,sounds serious!

The semester has started and yet, there is still hick up in the time table. That is ordinary, some might say, but it does not look or sound professional, if the time table is not ready for the students as well as the lecturers. To whom should it blame? There is a Malay proverb " bangau oh bangau! mengapa engkau tak mandi?" " The Bangau replied ' Macamana aku nak mandi,.." the culture of blaming other for any failure is not a good way actually, it can be seen as escapism, so reminding my self, before pointing others, look at yourself first and Doa everything will be running smoothly!

Don't get me wrong, I am not preparing any dishes nor sharing any recipe. I am not so good in cooking but yet, my sons admire my dishes, the third son said, "Dap ngat" which means so delicious. Yes, once in a while I do prepare their favourite dishes such as ayam madu, ayam tomato, etc. This week seems a long holiday for some, especially Chinese who are celebrating the Chinese New Year, and I guess it is not too late to wish them, a happy Chinese New YEar, Gong Xi FA Chai. As for me, I only took one day off, to register passport for my little princess. Where are we heading with the passport? just wait and see. Well, this week, it is time to do some review and to redecorate my office. Hmm, I guess I need an expert to assist me to redesign the office. It is totally full with papers and books.

Sounds interesting. It is like a never ending story.

alhamdulillah, last Thursday marked the born of our beloved Prophet, Muhammad, s.a.w. As a muslim, Islam is the way of life, we follow him as guidance and pray may Allah bless us always. Sallu' alaih. Ya Nabi Salam Alaik.

Well, the exam ends in the mid of January 2013. Although the numbers of my students are only 14 + 27 = 41 students only, I am also busy reading and supervising final project thesis written by my three students. Besides that, I am also co-supervising four PhD students who are writing in Arabic language. There is one Master student almost complete writing up his thesis. Another Master student who has just started the journey as a researcher. Well, it needs a high determination and full dedication to balance between teaching, supervision and research. It is a good arena to see how do you balance your work-life. Well, working ladies out there, perhaps you can share how do you juggle between work-family. It is not easy, definitely, but the support and courage from the beloved one is a must. Hey, time to keep on marking the scripts, where's my red pen?